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[Nov. 21st, 2007|10:43 am]
[music |Play Misty for me...]

Ed and Hank

I only have eyes for you...

As it turned out, About last night... (posted last Saturday) has a 2nd part

Note: Should be getting back to the road trip next time. Might be a little longer between posts than usual, (although Hank does realize there is no 'usual'). Disclaimer: Hank told their story to Annie Proulx. Jack and Ennis are all hers. Ed and Hank belong only to each other. Rating: PG $$: Nope. Comments: Always appreciated.

Part 1, About last night... (posted last Saturday) is here:

Everything else is here:

I only have eyes for you...

"Still think ya cheated."

"How the hell could I have cheated?
I took a shower 'n I got dressed. Like I always do.
Won tha' bet fair 'n square."

"Didya brush yer teeth?"

"You kissed me 'fore we left...
Why don' you tell me?"

"Yeah. You brushed yer teeth."

"'Course I did, dumbass."

"Hey... lookit tha', Ed...
They got themselves a new motto here..."

"Taste the West, huh?"


"Tastes a lot like pancakes."

"Sure does."

"Real good pancakes."

"Guess I shoulda ordered a short stack...
'M gettin' real full... Ya wan' some a mine, Ed?"

"Nope 'm full too."

"Looks like Tom's takin' a break...
I'll be righ' back..."



"Ya ready ta go, Ed?
Or ya wanna 'nother cup a coffee?"

"Jeez, Hank..."




"Jus' tha'... Dammit...
I wish ya'd stop flirtin' with tha' cook."

"I weren't flirtin' with Tom."

"Ya were so.
'N ya do it ev'ry time we come in here."

"You serious, Ed?"

"Yeah. No... I dunno... Maybe...
Yer always smilin' at him 'n yer always laughin' ta gether...
'N this time ya even had him posin' fer a picture.
Bet he'd give ya the shirt off a his back...
If'n ya asked fer it or not..."

"Been wonderin' how ta break it to ya, Ed...
Tom 'n me are runnin' off ta gether.
A week from next Tuesday."

"Fine. I'll help ya pack."

"Ya ain't got no reason ta be jealous, dumbass.
Ya know I like my fellas more my age.
'N I like 'em nice 'n long-legged.
'N kinda stupid-like."

"Know it's stupid.
Jus' cain't help it sometimes.
Yer so damn... friendly... 'Specially ta him."

"I like Tom. He's a good guy.
'Sides... ya know damn well he ain't gay."

"You tellin' me if'n he were...
I'd have somethin' ta worry 'bout?"

"You are such a dumbass sometimes.
Ya know I only got eyes fer you... dontcha, Ed...?"

"Yeah. I guess."

"'Sides... Ain't a bad idea ta make friends
 with the fella tha' cooks yer food."

"True 'nough."

"Hey, Myrna...?"

"Whatcha need, Hank?"

"If'n ya ain't too busy..."

"I ain't never too busy fer you, Darlin'."

 "Wouldya mind puttin' on some Johnny Cash fer us?
Maybe tha' 'Walk the Line' song a his?"

"Sure thing, Darlin'.
Justa sec."

"Thanks, Myrna."

"Think yer funny, huh?"

"Don' know wha' yer talkin' 'bout."

Ya ain't gonna sing...
Please tell me ya ain't gonna sing...
They won't never let us back in here if'n ya sing.
'N I really like their pancakes."


"I ain't gonna sing."


"I keep a close watch
on this heart a mine. I keep my eyes wide open all the time.
I keep the ends out fer the tie tha' binds...
Because yer mine... I walk the line."

"Ya said you weren't gonna sing."

"Cain't help it. 'S a catchy tune.
I ain't bein' tha' loud."

"Yer bein' louder than ya think."

"Okay, okay... I'll quit."

"So's... you walk the line, huh?"

"Yep. Because yer mine."

"Meanin'... Ya love me...
So's ya ain't never gonna screw 'round on me...
Even though yer tempted all the time
'N ya'd really like ta."

"Nope. Meanin'... I love ya...
So's I ain't never gonna screw 'round on ya
because I wouldn' never wanna be with no else
besides you, dumbass."

"Don' think tha's wha' Johnny meant."

"Maybe not.
But tha's what I mean."

"Don' matter what Johnny meant, Ed.
You should listen ta what Hank says he means.
'Cause I fer one believe Hank means a lotta what he says.
And that's more than I can say regardin' most folks.
You two 'bout ready fer yer check now?
Or can I warm ya up...?"


"Think we're 'bout done.
Thanks, Myrna. 'Preciate it."

"Just call 'em how I see 'em. Lessee...
Know yer check's in this stack somewhere..."

"You should listen ta Myrna, Ed.
Think she knows wha' she's talkin' 'bout."


"Damn right I do.
I been 'round the block more 'n once.
By the way... My condolences, Ed... I had no idea.
Have you thought 'bout tryin' ear plugs?
Might help some."

"Maybe I could give 'em a try. D'ya think they got 'em fer dogs?
I feel real bad fer them dogs a ours."

"Bet they do."

"I ain't that bad... Am I?"

"'Fraid I'm gonna hafta refuse to answer that
on the grounds that I have yet to get my tip from you today.
Now I'm thinkin' I shoulda shut my trap a l'il sooner.
But it's hard ta teach an old dog ta shut up.
Here's yer check, boys."

"I'll take tha', Myrna..."

"Thanks, Ed.
Now you two don' do anythin' I wouldn' do...
'Course I'll try most anythin' once."

"See ya later, Myrna."

A few minutes later...

"Where is Henry anyways?"

"He should be right 'round this corner."

"Hey, Hank... Lookit tha' sign...
Ya think they got any jeans in my size?"

"Don' get yer hopes up Ed...
Mos' folks 'round these parts wear their jeans
'til there ain't much left but the holes."

"True 'nough."

"'Course we could prob'by find ya
a real nice pair or two a them polyester Sansabelt pants.
Heard them things don' never wear out."

"Thanks, but no thanks.
But at fifty cents a piece... maybe I could get you
two or three pairs fer Christmas."

"'N ta think all this time I thought ya liked me."

"Hey... There's Henry, Hank..."

"Looks like they got the poor guy wearin'
them Sansabelt pants."

"Wonder what he did ta deserve tha'?"

"'N he looks a l'il worried tha' someone
migh' be plannin' ta throw 'nother sheet over him."

"He kinda does at tha'...
Uh... Hank...?"


"Sorry I were such a dumbass at the restaurant."

"'S okay, Ed..."

"I know ya jus' like ta talk ta folks."

"'N I know it can get irritatin' fer ya sometimes."

"Think maybe I am jealous, but..."

"Jeez, Ed... I told ya... There ain't no reason..."

"Lemme finish...
But 's more like 'm jealous of you...
On accounta you can talk ta other folks so easy-like.
I ain't never been able ta... 'N sometimes...
I wish I could do tha' too."

"'S just the way ya are, Ed.
'N there ain't nothin' wrong with bein' tha' way.
'S prob'bly partly jus' you... 'N partly on accounta yer folks.
But ya know damn well ya talk ta folks okay once ya get ta know 'em.
Jus' takes a while fer you ta be able ta trust 'em well 'nough.
'N hell... I cain't hardly get ya ta shut up no more."

"Guess yer righ'.
'N most times it don' bother me none.
Let's jus' ferget 'bout it... So's... wha'd ol' Henry do
ta get his self cast in bronze anyways?"

"This sign says he were picked ta lead
36 men 'n 11 wagons through a blindin' blizzard ta settle this town
in November a 1851."

"They musta come from
a awful long ways 'way ta get ta this place in November.
Not the best timin' fer settlin' somewheres...
 wha' with winter comin'."

"Well... This says they came from the next town up the road.
Tha's only 'bout fifteen miles away."

"Yer kiddin'?"


"Ya'd think somone
woulda took a look outside at the weather
'n said... 'I dunno Henry, d'ya think maybe we should settle
 tha' there town tomorrow? Or the next day?
Or maybe next fuckin' spring'?"

"Ya'd think.
Looks like poor ol' Henry hadn' been in this country too long...
Maybe tha' were their way a hazin' him."

"Gotta tell ya... Know there's been some real bad things done here...
But a lot a this town's history makes me laugh too."

"Yeah... Like tha' big ol' statue they have
commemoratin' buildin' the first buildin' fer tha' college.
They ended up doin' that in winter too 'cause a some dumbass deadline.
 Climbed up tha' there mountain ta cut down some trees at the beginnin' a January.
Took 'em days ta get there through shoulder deep snow 'n then they had ta come back
 'cause they didn' bring no sleighs ta move the trees. Jus' wagons tha' wouldn' work.
 'N then they couldn' get them wagons back down again after bringin' 'em up
on accounta the trail were drifted over 'n the snow were even deeper.
A big ol' horse saved the day fer 'em... 'N tha' statue's fer him.
They said he'd throw his self inta them drifts 'n then
sit back 'n rest like a dog on his haunches 'n
then heave a big ol' sigh 'n get back up
'n do it all over again."

"I can 'magine what he were thinkin' when he sighed...
'Whatta buncha dumbasses'."

"Imagine he was."

"Guess they figured it'd make fer more 'xcitin'
history book readin' if'n they did stuff durin' blizzards."

"Guess so."

"Wha's tha' they say 'bout dumbasses rushin' in
where sane folks fear ta tread...?"

"Tha's purty much wha' they say.
More or less anyways."

"'N weren't there a fort they kept buildin' 'n movin'...?"

"Yeah... The sign said poor ol' Henry worked on tha' too...
First they put it right under a big ol' hill..."

"Don' make a whole lotta sense ta put
a fort at the bottom of a hill..."

"Nope. It didn' make no sense.
So's someone with a smidge more sense
came 'n told 'em ta move it."

'N then they put it out in the middle a tha' flood plain...
didn' they...?"

"Yep. 'N tha' same fella came back
'n told them they shouldna put the fort in the flood plain.
'N then he showed them 'xactly where they should put tha' there fort.
So's they built it again where he told them they should.
'Course... after all that it turned out tha' they didn'
really need the fort in the first place."

"Ya think they woulda used the buildin' material from tha' fort
ta build tha' buildin' fer tha' college."

"Tha' were years later...
So's they prob'bly already used it fer somethin' else."

"Then they jus' shoulda made a sign sayin' 'This here's the College'
'n stuck it on some other buildin'."

"Think they tried tha',
but them folks in charge said tha' were cheatin'."

"Assume them folks in charge
weren't the same ones that had ta climb the damn mountain
'n do some loggin' in the middle a winter?"

"'Course not."

"Maybe they shoulda dismantled
some other buildin' in rebuilt it where they was s'posed
ta build tha' buildin'."

"Maybe they didn' have no extra buildin's
lyin' 'round ta dismantle."

"Prob'bly not..."

"Yeah... It bein' the olden days 'n all..."

"'N didn' ya tell me tha' they named the place after a tree
tha' don' grow nowheres near here?"

"Yep. They thought the trees 'round here
were them kinda trees... But they weren't."

"'S almos' like the Three Stooges
settled this town."

"Sure does seem tha' way sometimes."

"Hey, Hank... Ain't you descended from
some a them pioneers?"

"'S poss'ble."

"Sure would 'xplain a lot..."

"Think I been insulted 'n my father's been insulted
'n my father's father's been insulted 'n a few fathers 'fore tha' too.."

"Yeah. 'M purty sure you all been insulted.
Really only intended ta insult you."

"Thanks a lot."

"Yer welcome."

"Hey, Ed... Dontcha think poor ol' Henry
 looks like he's missin' somethin...?
How 'bout... this...?"

"Take yer hat off a him, Hank."

"Ain't hurtin' him none."

"We're standin' practic'lly right outside the police station..."

"'N jus' whaddya think they'd charge me with...?
Unlawful haberdasherin'?"

"Now who's usin' fancy words...?"

"Guess I am."

"Wait a minute... Ya know...
With yer hat on... Henry looks a l'il like Clint Eastwood.
If'n ya squint some 'n all..."


"Think yer seein' things, Ed...
Mus' be yer obsession with Clint Eastwood...
'S always... 'Hey, Hank... Why don' we watch ev'ry single
Clint Eastwood movie a hund'erd 'n nine times.
'N then maybe jus' once more
fer good measure'."

"But ya know I only got eyes fer you... dontcha, Hank?"

Yeah. I guess so..."

"'Cause... 'I keep a close watch on this heart a mine
I keep my eyes wide open all the time. I keep the ends out
fer the tie tha' binds. Because yer mine...
 I walk the line'."

"Serenadin' me in public in fron' a the police station...?
Ain't ya 'fraid they're gonna arrest ya?"

"Fer wha'?
Bein' in love with a dumbass?
'M already servin' a life sentence fer tha'."

"Yep. With no poss'bility a parole."

"Wouldn' have it no other way."

"Me neither, Ed."

"So's... Are ya feelin' lucky, punk?"

"Aw... C'mon, Ed... Do the whole thing."

"Okay... 'Ya gotta ask yer self one question:
'Do I feel lucky?' Well, do ya punk'?"

"I feel damn lucky."

"Yeah. Me too."

"How 'bout I go ahead 'n make yer day, Ed?"

"Ya mean...?"

"Yep. Yer choice a Clint Eastwood movies.
Maybe even a double feature."

"Sounds real good ta me."

"'S a date then."

"'N after tha', Hank..."


"How 'bout I go ahead 'n make yer day?"


"Think 'm feelin' even luckier now."

Later on...
Back at the ranch...

"Ya wan' me ta play 'Misty' fer ya, Ed?"

"Does it matter if'n I don'?"



"Don' think tha's the righ' song, dumbass."

"Righ' song. Diff'rent version.
Thought you migh' like this one better."

"Guess I do... But..."

"But wha'?"

"'M 'fraid I migh' not be able ta make yer day tonigh'
'cause 'm kinda wore out from makin'
yer day last nigh'..."

 "It don' matter, Ed...
Ya know I get misty jus' holdin' yer hand."

"'S yer lucky day then, on accounta I think I migh'
be able ta muster up just enough
energy ta hold yer hand."

"C'mere, dumbass."


"Uh... Hank...?"

"Yeah, Ed?"

"That ain't my hand."

"You sure?"

"'M sure."

"Ya wan' me ta stop?"


"You sure?"

"'M sure. Jus' don' 'xpect... you know...
nothin' like last night..."

"All's I 'xpect is fer you ta lie back
while I do wha' tha' there song says 'n wander
'round this here wonderland
on m' own."

"Jus' lemme know if'n ya get lost.
Or if'n ya need directions somewheres."

"Purty sure I know my way 'round."

"If'n you say so...
'Course yer the one tha' weren't able
ta tell m' hand from..."

"Think I got it all figured out now."

"Yeah... Damn...
I think maybe ya do. "


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[User Picture]From: jennydcf
2007-11-21 09:24 pm (UTC)

Why in God's name were the pioneers so dumb?

Henry does look uneasy. Maybe he just didn't want to be associated with leading that wagon train into the snow storm--if I'd been that dumb I might not want it commemorated. Of course it could just be pigeon anxiety--a lot of statues suffer from that, specially when they haven't been sculpted with hats on.:-)

I just heard several stories about the pilgrims and other settlers and their relations with the Indians, who beat the pants off them for a long time because they were incredibly bad at learning from experience. Forts at the bottom of hills or on floodplains involve no thought at all, being they were constantly being built. Didn't any of these people have military training? And it's hard to imagine that guys who had lived 15 miles away couldn't figure out that winter was a really bad time to be logging. Sigh. Seems unfair that they're Hank's ancestors--he's not anywhere near that dumb.

He does have some other drawbacks, though: By the way... My condolences, Ed... I had no idea. Have you thought 'bout tryin' ear plugs? Might help some."

"Maybe I could give 'em a try. D'ya think they got 'em fer dogs?
I feel real bad fer them dogs a ours."

"Bet they do."

"I ain't that bad... Am I?"

"'Fraid I'm gonna hafta refuse to answer that
on the grounds that I have yet to get my tip from you today."

Then again, Ed's real good at standin' what he can't fix--and pretty good at keepin Hank's mouth occupied when it gets to be too much.:-) So I'm not too worried.

Always good to hear from you, 'Blue. And, of course, from the boys. I'm real thankful for them, and for you.

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[User Picture]From: myeyesaintblue
2007-11-26 04:53 am (UTC)

Re: Why in God's name were the pioneers so dumb?

LOL - Out in these here parts, it seems like the dumber the mistakes the bigger the statue is that's put up to commemorate them.

I think, like a lot of folks back then, poor ol' Henry was probably a city boy who had no idea exactly what he was getting into.

As to Hank not being "anywhere near that dumb", well, since he's the writer he does get to leave out what he wants to leave out... (And he leaves out a lot.) :D

Hank has to confess that he sometimes lets loose with a particularly off-key tune just so Ed will try to fix what he can't stand and shut him up good. Real good.

And Ed and Hank and I are real thankful that you're still reading and enjoying their story. (Well, Hank and I are, Ed doesn't care so much. At least he pretends he doesn't, but I think he does.)
(Reply) (Parent) (Thread)
From: ellenlj
2007-11-21 11:36 pm (UTC)

hee hee

can't believe with all Hank's shenanigans abroad, Ed acts up in a restaurant at home - and gets caught! no justice

like the insight into jealousy/envy at ease with people/flirting

and I totally believe in sucking up to those cooking for you!

Happy Thanksgiving!

(Reply) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: myeyesaintblue
2007-11-26 04:57 am (UTC)

Re: hee hee

Hey there,

Yeah, poor Ed just can’t ever catch a break. Hank finds it pretty funny. Ed not so much.

But Ed does agree that it’s not a bad idea to be nice to those who are cooking for you, so he's trying to keep that jealous streak of his under control.

Glad you liked it and hope you had a great Thanksgiving!
(Reply) (Parent) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: lalaynia
2007-11-22 01:12 am (UTC)
You should listen ta Myrna, Ed.
Think she knows wha' she's talkin' 'bout."


"Damn right I do.
I been 'round the block more 'n once.
By the way... My condolences, Ed... I had no idea.
Have you thought 'bout tryin' ear plugs?
Might help some."

"Maybe I could give 'em a try. D'ya think they got 'em fer dogs?
I feel real bad fer them dogs a ours."

"Bet they do."

"I ain't that bad... Am I?"

It could only have been better if he began doing the Hustle while singing.

Blue, you are SO funny- but then again you have great influencers.

Happy Thanksgiving!!

(Reply) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: myeyesaintblue
2007-11-26 05:02 am (UTC)
Hey L/J/D,

Thanks, but you know I can’t take credit for the funny - That’s all Ed and Hank.

Btw, Hank is now doing the hustle because you suggested it and he thought it was a great idea. Ed says, ‘thanks a lot’. (I think I detected a note of sarcasm there, but you know he really loves it.) :D

Hope you had a great Thanksgiving!

P.S. And Hank has since found out that, yes, they DO have earplugs for dogs.
(Reply) (Parent) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: trekfan
2007-11-22 02:31 am (UTC)
oooo What was Hank holdin instead of Ed's hand ;)

this was a lovely part. I can see Ed liking Clint Eastwood movies. They could watch them and NECK too :D
(Reply) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: myeyesaintblue
2007-11-26 05:05 am (UTC)
Neither Hank or Ed is saying what Hank was holdin’ instead of Ed’s hand. We’ll just have to guess... Hmmm... Nope. I don’t have a clue.

Hank refuses to neck during Clint Eastwood movies 'cause he thinks Ed will just pretend he's Clint. I guess poor ol' Hank has a jealous streak too. :D
(Reply) (Parent) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: torry28
2007-11-22 03:07 am (UTC)
In order to quote a part I particularly like I would have to write the entire chapter over again, there is not one word in the entire chapter that does not make me extremely happy. You and your friends have made this Thanksgiving extra special and I wish you, Ed and Hank and the rest of the cast the same.

Thank you

PS. Thank you for all the information, I have learned a lot about this country just by reading your story.
(Reply) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: myeyesaintblue
2007-11-26 05:17 am (UTC)
Hey there,

That is so sweet of you to say and I'm really glad you liked it!

And we all hope you had a great Thanksgiving too! (Hank might post a short entry about their Thanksgiving in a day or two because it was more eventful than expected. :) )

(And, thanks, I'm glad you've been enjoying the road trip too!)

(Reply) (Parent) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: joetheone
2007-11-22 06:17 am (UTC)

Great fun

I don't know how I missed last Saturday posting I must be losing it some or oh yeah it was the Saturday night regular well maybe that was it who knows but as always I'm awful glad I found it and read it tonight as the food is simmering away in the house and my partner is decorating the house I just had to sit and sigh at the songs and enjoy. Yeah I'm cooking up a feast for no one. LOL oh well the house smells good but I would rather sit back watch a couple of those movies and maybe hold hands the way you guys are. HMM Pat where are you? lol he likes the Turkey too much to be holding hands now and the bad part the Turkey will wear him out and he still won't want to hold hands but that is ok that is life and I love pancakes also. Joe
(Reply) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: myeyesaintblue
2007-11-26 05:27 am (UTC)

Re: Great fun

Hey Joe,
I'm sure your feast was wonderful! I could almost smell the food cooking and picture the decorations. And when it comes to Thanksgiving, like Pat, Ed would definitely rather have a feast than hold hands too.

So glad you enjoyed this part and the songs too!

Hope you and Pat had a great Thanksgiving!

(And I bet you eventually got to hold hands too.)

(Reply) (Parent) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: eandj
2007-11-22 07:20 am (UTC)
Haha I had a smile on my face the whole time while reading this.
Loved the talk in the restaurant with Myrna"Shit..."

Oh and this:
"Think I got it all figured out now."

"Yeah... Damn...
I think maybe ya do. "


(Reply) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: myeyesaintblue
2007-11-26 05:33 am (UTC)
So glad Ed and Hank made you smile!

And I'm glad you liked Myrna too. Hank sure does. And Ed too, for that matter. (Although he still doesn't really care for Tom.)
(Reply) (Parent) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: argentine65
2007-11-22 12:03 pm (UTC)

Ed and Hank

Blue: I love your jealous Ed: "Know it's stupid.
Jus' cain't help it sometimes.Yer so damn... friendly... 'Specially ta him." and now beside love your Ed and your Hank and you I love Myrna. Thank you for make my day. Martha

(Reply) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: myeyesaintblue
2007-11-26 05:36 am (UTC)

Re: Ed and Hank

Hey there,

Happy to hear Ed and Hank could 'make your day'!

I gotta admit, Hank kinda likes his Ed a little jealous sometimes too. (Not too jealous, just jealous enough.)

I'm glad you liked Myrna too. Thanks!
(Reply) (Parent) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: samtyr
2007-11-23 07:42 pm (UTC)
This is so great. I love the pancake scene, and the pioneer statue scene and... well, just all of it! :) Thank you so much for sharing this.
(Reply) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: myeyesaintblue
2007-11-26 05:44 am (UTC)
So glad to hear that you liked it! Thanks!
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