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[Mar. 13th, 2009|09:28 am]
Ed and Hank

A night at the Oscars...

Note: Oscar night was a little more... uh... dramatic... than Hank expected.

Disclaimer: Hank told their story to Annie Proulx. Jack and Ennis are all hers. Ed and Hank belong only to each other. Rating: PG-13 or higher for offensive talk.$$: Nope.

Links to all other posts are here:

A night at the Oscars...

Please read this before reading: This post includes very offensive gay-bashing talk. Hank wasn't sure about posting this... But it's what was said... so... here it is...

"Do we gotta go, Hank...?"

"Yeah... we gotta go... Betty 'n Bill invited us ta tha' new bar in town ta watch the Oscars with 'em... 'n we ain't backin' out this close ta show time..."

"Dammit, Hank... Ya know I don't like goin' out ta any a the bars in town..."

"You don't like goin' nowheres."

"Yeah, but..."

"I heard the food there's purty good... 'N they got them big ol' TVs..."

"I still don't wanna go."

"Uh... Ed...?"


"Ya do realize yer the one that answered the phone today when Betty called ta ask us... 'n yer the one that said we'd go..."

"Yeah. I know. But I still don't wanna go."

"Well if'n you really don't wanna go then ya don't hafta go... But I'm still goin'... 'N I ain't makin' no excuses fer you... So if yer not goin' yer gonna hafta call Betty 'n tell her yerself..."

"Fine. If'n yer gonna twist my arm like that... I guess I don't got no choice."




"You okay, Hank...?"

"Yeah... I think so... My head hurts... 'n my ear's ringin' some... 'n my neck got wrenched... but I'm okay..."

"D'ya think we should go ta the hospital...?"

"Nah... It ain't tha' bad... So's let's just head home..."

"Wha' the hell happened anyways...?"

"Well... You heard that asshole at the bar... didn't ya...? Yellin' all that at the TV right in the middle a tha' gay fella's speech acceptin' the Oscar fer writin' the screenplay fer 'MILK'... Damn... that was one helluva touchin' speech... too bad that idiot had ta go 'n ruin it..."

"I guess yer hearin's better than ours... 'cause Betty 'n Bill 'n I heard someone yellin' somethin'... but none of us could make out what exactly he was sayin' over the sound of the TV... Alls we knew was tha' ya got up 'n left the table real abrupt-like..."

"Well what he said wasn't good."

"What did he say...?"

"You sure you wanna know...?"

"Yeah. I wanna know."

"Ya know ya cain't un-know it once ya know it..."

"Just tell me, Hank."

"Okay then... He said... 'All these fuckin' faggots are takin' over the country 'n turnin' our kids queer 'n we should round 'em all up 'n put 'em in Gitmo'... Tha's the gist of it anyways..."

"Shit... he said we should be rounded up...?"

"Yeah. 'N on my way over ta where he was standin' I thought about reachin' across the aisle 'n tryin' ta have one a them bi-partisan discussions with him... but then it occurred ta me that his idea of a compromise would prob'bly be ta waterboard us just once a week instead a twice a week..."

"So's... wha' didya say ta him...?"

"I just went up ta him 'n said... 'I just happen ta be one a them faggots you were just referrin' to... 'n I know ya think we're real scary... but we ain't... 'n we don't wanna take over the whole damn country... or turn yer kids gay... so's ya don't gotta round us all up in put us in Gitmo... 'cause alls we want is ta live our lives with the same rights that you got... no more... 'n no less..."

"I thought ya woulda said worse than that."

"Yeah... I was tryin' ta take the higher road... at first anyways... But then he said... If'n yer really one a them fuckin' faggots then why dontcha prove it 'n get down on yer knees 'n suck my cock... 'n then..."


"Yeah... 'n then I said... 'I'm sorry ta hafta break it to ya, but you ain't my type... In fact... I'd wager a ignorant, grinch-hearted bastard like yerself ain't nobody's type'..."


"Yeah... I don't know where the hell tha' came from... 'n then I said... 'N tha's prob'bly the real reason why yer so het up about us gay folks... you 'n yer pal Senator Buttars both... yer both just jealous 'cause neither one of you can get no one... queer, straight or anywheres in between... ta suck yer grinch-like dicks for ya..."

"Jeez, Hank..."

"I know... I know... I shoulda tried harder ta stick ta the higher road... but tha's wha' came out... 'N then some a the folks around us started laughin'... Especially this one woman... she snorted 'n then let out a real loud hoot... 'n then I heard you sayin' my name 'n I turned ta look in the direction you were comin' from 'n tha's when he sucker-punched me... So... technic'lly... it's all yer fault... 'cause if'n I hadna turned my head I woulda seen tha' punch comin' 'n ducked..."


"I guess tha's wha' wrenched my neck... my head already bein' turned when he hit me... 'N you know the rest... you slugged him 'n he went flyin'... But... ya know... I coulda taken care of it myself..."

"You were on the floor, Hank..."

"Tha's only 'cause I was kinda off-balance when he hit me... 'N I woulda got up. Sooner or later."

"Most likely later."

"So's, Ed...?"


"If'n ya didn't know wha' that idiot said... 'n alls ya knew was that I left the table... then why'd ya come after me...?"

"I dunno... I guess ya just had this look about ya when ya left the table... the set a yer jaw or somethin'... 'N I thought about it fer a second...'n then I thought I'd better go 'n see where ya went..."

"Thanks, Ed... fer sluggin' him withou' stoppin' ta sort out wha' was goin' on..."

"When I saw him hit you... Hell... it ain't like I coulda stopped m'self... 'N I know if'n someone went after me you'd do the exact same thing."

"You bet I would."

"We were just lucky tha' fella's friends didn't join in... 'n tha' bartender didn't call the police... 'N lucky tha' fella didn't neither..."

"You got tha' backwards, Ed... He hit me first... So's he's lucky we didn't call the police... 'N I'm purty sure he wouldn't want wha' was said entered inta the o-fficial record of the Utah court system... 'N them bartenders sure as hell wanna avoid havin' the cops come whenever they can..."

"True 'nough."



"We really shoulda called the cops... I guess I weren't thinkin' straight after I got hit... 'n you got us outta there so fast... but callin' the cops ta report it woulda been the righ' thing ta do... standin' up fer ourselves-wise anyways..."

"Ya know damn well how the cops in this town woulda treated us... 'N besides... since I hit him after he hit you they woulda figured it all evened out... Ya know... 'move along there's nothin' more ta see here'... Or they maybe woulda turned it all around onta me somehows..."

"Yeah... I guess... But..."

"No buts, Hank... I couldna handled dealin' with the police on top of all tha'..."

"Is yer hand okay, Ed..."

"Yeah... It hurts like a sonofabitch... but I don't think nothin's broken..."


"Damn... my heart's still beatin' kinda fast though... I ain't punched no one since tha' time at work years ago... when that asshole said what he said about Iris..."

"I ain't punched no one since my rodeoin' days..."

"You didn't punch no one, dumbass."

"I guess I should say I ain't got punched by no one since my rodeoin' days..."

"I came real close ta punchin' ya a couple a times since then."

"I betcha did... So's... Whaddabout Bill 'n Betty...?"

"I told 'em I'd give 'em a call after I got ya settled in with an icepack at home..."

"I feel bad fer ruinin' the night... 'N fer outin' ya a l'il more than ya prob'bly wanted ta be outed..."

"A little more, huh...?"

"But... wha' tha' fella said... I jus' couldn't ignore it..."

"I know ya couldn't, Hank."

"So's... yer parkin' next ta the house again 'n not in the shed...? Yer gettin' awful predictable, Ed."


"Ya know... I forgot ta tell ya... there was a big ol' meteor a whole buncha folks saw streakin' across the sky in Texas... not more than five or six days ago... Hell... I read it was big 'n bright enough ta light up the sky in the middle a the day..."

"I'll still take my chances."

"'N I read it was about the size of a pick-up truck..."

"Yer makin' that up."

"I am not."

"Well... I'm still parkin' next ta the house."

"Ya like ta live dangerous-like, huh...?"

"It ain't like I got much choice with you around."

A couple of minutes later...

"Was tha' Bill on the phone...?"


"What'd he have ta say...?"

"Well... he said Betty wouldn't leave withou' findin' out what all happened... So's she was talkin' ta some a them folks who were nearby ta find out 'n it turns out Myrna was there too 'n she joined 'em... 'n I guess I shoulda hit tha' fella harder... 'cause Bill said tha' fella 'n his friends came back inta the bar just as him 'n Betty were gettin' ready ta go..."

"Yer kiddin'...?

"I ain't kiddin'... 'N Bill said Betty 'n Myrna... well they joined forces 'n laid inta tha' fella righ' good..."

"Jeez... I wish I woulda been there ta see tha'... He sure wouldna stood much of a chance with Betty 'n Myrna double-teamin' him..."

"He sure wouldna... 'N Bill... he said he tried ta put his two cents in a few times, but he couldn't hardly get a word 'n edgewise... So's mainly he just stood beside Betty 'n Myrna while they gave this fella wha' fer 'n braced his self fer the fists ta start flyin'... 'cause he knew if'n they did they'd be flyin' at him... but they didn't..."

"'N thanks be fer tha'."

"Yeah. 'N Betty 'n Myrna... they just kept on with it 'til they ran tha' fella 'n his friends clear outta the bar..."

"What exactly were Betty 'n Myrna sayin'...?"

"Bill didn't say... But whatever it was it worked... 'N then... as them assholes were leavin'... Bill said a few of the folks in the bar started applaudin' fer Betty 'n Myrna..."

"They did...? Yer kiddin'...?"

"I still ain't kiddin'... Tha's wha' Bill said anyways..."

"How many folks was it...?"

"I doubt Bill stopped ta count."

"I guess maybe this town is changin' l'il by l'il after all."

"I still wouldn't go holdin' yer breath, Hank."

"I ain't... So's...what else did Bill say...?"

"Whaddya mean...? Tha's about it..."

"Yeah...? Then how come I heard ya stammerin' at the end of tha' call...? Nothin' I heard so far woulda made ya stammer... not quite like that anyways... 'N yer face was about as red as it gets after ya hung up..."

"It weren't nothin'."

"C'mon, Ed... Spill it..."

"Fine. Bill just said if'n Betty 'n Myrna hadna done the job so well he woulda done it his self... one way or another... 'cause we're two a the best friends he's ever had 'n he wouldn' ever let no one get away with talkin' about us or any other gay folks like tha'..."

"Tha' was a real nice of him ta say."

"Yeah... It sure was..."

"'Course... he prob'bly just wants a raise."

"No way, Hank... Ya know damn well Bill ain't like that..."

"I was just kiddin', Ed..."

"You better have been."

"I was... Hell... I know Bill 'n Betty are two a the best friends we could ask fer too..."

"Yer damn right they are."

"So's... ya wanna watch the rest a them Oscars, Ed...?"

"We might as well..."

"Maybe we ain't missed tha' 'best supportin' actor' one yet..."

"How 'bout I go get us a couple a beers...?"

"Sounds good ta me."


"Well... least-wise I'm glad we still got ta see Heath Ledger win that Oscar."

"Yeah. He sure deserved it."

"I just wished they woulda had a l'il more of a real tribute to him... nothin' real long... just somethin' more."

"It did feel kinda abrupt-like."

"'N tha' musta been real difficult... 'n real bittersweet... fer his folks 'n his sister... acceptin' that award fer him..."

"Yeah... I'm sure tha' wound is wide open yet... 'n will be fer a helluva long time..."

"Tha's fer damn sure."

"'N I'm glad Sean Pean won fer bein' Harvey Milk too."

"Yeah. He deserved it too."

"We'll hafta rent tha' 'Slumdog Millionaire' movie..."


"Hey... lookit this, Ed... I told ya I weren't makin' it up..."


"Shit... Next thing ya know there's gonna be a big ol' UFO landin' in the yard..."

"Could be. Hey, Ed...?"


"Are you okay...?"

"Yeah... Like I said... my hand hurts... but I don't think I broke nothin'..."

"That ain't what I meant... I meant... the stuff tha' guy said... 'n him punchin' me..."

"I'm okay, Hank... 'S gonna take more than one... how was it ya put it...?"

"Ignorant, grinch-hearted bastard."

"'S gonna take a lot more than one ignorant, grinch-hearted, grinch-dicked bastard ta chase me back inta the closet... But..."


"I'll be righ' back..."

A minute later...

"Shotguns...? Damn, Ed... I don't think that idiot 'n his dumbass friends are gonna try anythin'..."

"Yeah... I don't neither... But... better safe than sorry... So's I'm puttin one next ta yer side a the bed 'n one next ta mine... just like the old days... Hell... we prob'bly never shoulda stopped keepin' 'em there in the first place..."

"I don't think we gotta do this, Ed... 'N ya know them dogs ain't the brightest dogs on the planet... they'll prob'bly manage ta knock 'em over 'n accidently shoot us or each other or Iristhecat in the middle of the night..."

"Here... If'n I put 'em behind the nightstands like this them dogs can't get at 'em but we still can... 'N them smoke alarms... they all got batteries... right...?"

"Yeah. They got batteries... ya know damn well we changed 'em all right after New Year's..."

"'N tomorrow let's double check them ones in the barn that're wired ta go off in the house..."

"The'yre fine, Ed... We tested them at the same time..."

"'N we're testin' 'em again tomorrow."

"Okay... we'll test 'em again tomorrow..."

"'N speakin' a them dogs... I hate ta separate 'em... but I was thinkin' of leavin' one of 'em downstairs 'n keepin' the other up here with us..."

"Ya cain't do that, Ed... The one shut outta the room is gonna think we don't like him as much 'n get some kinda complex... 'N how wouldya pick which one anyways...? 'N ya know whichever one it is is just gonna end up sittin' outside the door 'n whinin' all night..."

"Okay... they can both stay in here like usual... 'N where's Iristhecat...?"

"Curled up on the top shelf of tha' closet... like usual..."


"'N some day I'm gonna see exactly how it is she gets up 'n down from there..."

"'N I know the doors 'n windows are all locked... So's I guess that's it then... But... d'ya think it's better with the yard light on or off...?"

"I dunno, Ed... On I guess... Hey... You ain't gonna start turnin' them lights on in that ol' trailer again... are ya...?"

"No. I ain't."

"Maybe we should just ask Betty 'n Myrna ta stay with us fer a while...?"


"I'm just sayin'..."

"Yeah... yeah... I know ya think I'm way over-reactin'... but I ain't... I'm just bein' cautious..."

"I think it's just seein' tha' movie about Harvey Milk last week tha's got ya so on edge..."

"Yeah. That must be it. It couldn' poss'bly be because of tha' guy tha' punched ya after he said queer folks were after kids 'n should be rounded up..."

"Ya know them kinda jerks ain't exactly rare in these parts... 'N with the kinda stuff tha's been goin' on... wha' with tha' Prop 8 stuff spillin' over inta this here state 'cause a the Mormons spendin' all tha' money ta get it passed... 'n that inspirin' us gay folks here ta start protestin' fer our rights... 'n tha' dumbass Senator Buttars spewin' all tha' crap about gay folks bein' 'the biggest threat ta this country'... there's bound ta be even more bigots takin' all that as a green light fer gettin' bolder about voicin' their hate..."

"You ain't exactly makin' me feel any better, dumbass..."

"Well... most a them folks are just big ol' blow hards... 'n that idiot in the bar just saw the chance ta sucker-punch me 'n took it... not knowin' you were comin' ta my rescue..."

"Hell... I didn't even know I was comin' ta yer rescue..."

"Well I'm glad ya were... whether ya knew it or not... 'N if'n he'd a known you were my bodyguard he never woulda threw tha' punch..."

"Maybe not... But what if ya had been by yer self...? 'N ya know damn well there's some real crazy 'n real violent folks out there who don't need much of a reason ta hurt other folks... especially queer folks... 'n the kinda stuff Buttars has been sayin' migh' just be enough ta push 'em over the edge... So's I don't think yer takin' this serious enough..."

"I know well enough what kinda folks are out there... Hell... I'm beginnin' ta regret sayin' anythin' ta tha' fella... especially if'n it's gonna make ya all nervous-like again..."

"He said we were after kids, Hank... 'N tha' we should be rounded up... 'N if'n I was the one that heard it I prob'bly woulda just sat there all tongue-tied 'n hatin' m'self fer not sayin' anythin'... Or I woulda punched him right off 'n then I woulda been the bad guy in a lotta folks' eyes... So's... even though it put me on edge again... I guess I'm glad ya said somethin'... 'n not just because a him... Hell... I doubt there's any changin' the minds of folks like him... but because there was a whole lotta other folks there listenin' ta him who didn't have the nerve ta say nothin' neither..."

"'Except fer Betty 'n Myrna... Once they knew about it anyways..."

"Yeah... 'N Bill... Betty, Mryna 'n Bill..."

"But... like I said... maybe I shoulda stuck more ta the high road..."

"Maybe you shoulda... But then again... if'n ya take too high a road sometimes them folks on the low road ain't gonna pay ya no mind... 'N tha' fella... he most likely is justa big ol' blow-hard... like ya said... but tha' don't mean I ain't gonna take some precautions just in case... least-wise fer a while anyways..."

"'N I'll take 'em too, Ed."


"So's... How long's it gonna take fer me ta get ya inta town again...?"

"A year... maybe two at the outset."

"What if'n there were pancakes or pie involved...?"

"Then I'd say a week... maybe two at the outset."

"It's a date... But, Ed..."


"I know you ain't gonna wanna leave the ranch righ' now... not after what happened 'n all... but... how 'bout we give it a couple of weeks 'n then go campin'... not just fer a couple a days... but fer a week... or more maybe..."

"I dunno, Hank..."

"C'mon, Ed... Ya know I love our life on this here ranch... but I'm feelin' the need ta get even further away from tha' town 'n some a the folks in it... fer a l'il while anyways..."

"Okay... In a few weeks... 'n if nothin' else happens... 'n if'n Bill 'n Betty are willin' ta stay out here 'n watch the place... I'll go... But not fer more than a week... 'n I don't wanna be goin' too far away... Not off ta the coast again like last year..."

"'S okay... I thought maybe we'd go ta the coast this summer... on our way ta Chicago ta visit Iris..."

"That ain't hardly on the way, dumbass..."

"It is once ya get there... Or it ain't out a the way no more anyways... I should check them tide charts online so's we can pick a good time ta go..."

"Hold yer damn horses, Hank... We'll just hafta wait 'n see wha's goin' on with Bill 'n Betty 'n all... 'n even then... I ain't sure if'n we can afford it..."

"...'N then once we're headin' ta Chicago from there there'll be a whole buncha other stuff on the way too... maybe we could go ta tha' Glacier National Park... or ta Yellowstone... we ain't been there in years... 'n ya know how them geysers get me goin'..."

"Ev'rythin' gets you goin'."

"You complainin'...?"


"I didn't think so... So's... ya want some music on, Ed...?"

"Yeah. I could use some music... Somethin' kinda peaceful-like though... ta soothe my jangled nerves a l'il maybe..."

"Here... How 'bout this..."


"You got a real peculiar idea of wha' 'peaceful-like' means..."

"I betcha it'll soothe them jangled nerves of yers just the same..."

"Where the hell didya get a Lorne Greene cd anyways...?"

"With tha' there internet you can wrangle up just about anythin' ya wanna..."

"Thanks, Hank."

"Yer welcome... So's... D'ya feel like ridin' the range tonight, Cowboy...?"

"Yer head don't hurt too bad...?"

"Not if yer hand don't."

"It don't."

"Well then 'Hi Ho Silver, awaaay'...!"

"Ooomph...! That's the wrong show, dumbass..."

"Well then how 'bout I'll be Matt Dillon 'n you be Miss Kitty...?"

"Ya know damn well that still ain't the right show... 'N besides... I think I'd be Matt Dillon tonight... after steppin' in ta defend Miss Kitty's honor 'n all..."

"Anythin' you say, Mr. Dillon..."

"Tha's Marshall Dillon..."

"Anythin' you say, Marshall Dillon... 'Course if'n ya'd rather... I could be Newly... Or Chester... Or Festus even... Or Fergus... Remember...? Festus had a twin brother 'n his name was Fergus... Or we could do one a them cross-over shows... 'n you could still be Marshall Dillon 'n I could be Ben Cartwright... or Adam... or L'il Joe... or Hoss... 'n you 'n I join forces ta fight the bad guys... or you could be comin' ta arrest me... even though I'm innocent a course 'n..."


"Too bad we don't got any handcuffs... I guess we can make do with..."



"I got a better idea... How 'bout you jus' be Hank 'n I'll jus' be Ed...?"

"Ed 'n Hank, huh...?"

"Yeah. Hank 'n Ed."

"What's the story line...?"

"One big dumbass falls real hard fer another big dumbass... 'n they eventually manage ta get together permanent-like 'n live happily ever after... most a the time anyways..."

"I dunno... I guess I'm willin' ta give it a go... but it sounds a l'il dull..."

"Yeah... I wish... C'mere, dumbass..."


We chased lady luck 'til we fin'ly struck... Bonanza!
With a gun 'n a rope 'n a hat full of hope
we planted our family tree

We got a hold of a pot full of gold... Bonanza!
With a horse 'n a saddle 'n a rig full a cattle
how rich can a fella be?

On this land we put our brand... Cartwright is the name
Fortune smiled the day we filed
the Ponderosa claim

Here in the West we're livin' in the best... Bonanza!
If anyone fights any one of us
He's gotta fight with me!




Update: Just ta let y'all know... alls been quiet on the ranch, so Ed is starting to relax some and they're going to take off camping on Sunday for a week or so (Ed) or more (Hank).


[User Picture]From: joetheone
2009-03-13 09:27 pm (UTC)

Well I'm proud of you two

Yep, it is one of those things you either say something and try and take the high road or you end up down in the gutter with the other party but at least you did not throw the first punch and well, that makes you the better man in deed. Yes, it is good to have back up in a situation like that and it is good to have friends with you to help out. Times are changing slowly but surely and even though the big old blow hards of the world get louder sometimes it is easier to take the wind out of their sails. I'm sorry you had to experience this hate in your town. My young friend in Salt Lake City just ran into a problem one of his friends got beaten pretty bad by a group of guys walking in his neighborhood with his dog and then my friends car got spray painted with nasty words during the night. Unfortunately Utah is a hot seat right now and well if this is where we have to make a stand then this is where it has to be.

On a good note the house in PA just passed the bill giving us protection rights at work. It has to go to the senate and then probably back to the house and then the govenor of course but it is a step in the right direction. I'm hoping it goes through. It is sad to think that a law that Harvey Milk was trying for in California 31 years ago is finally getting headway here in PA. It may take another 31 years for more laws to give us more rights but I'm willing to wait it out and if I'm not around then I'm hoping it will be better for the future generations of gay people. I look at what it was like in 1979 when I was 13 and coming out of the closet in NYC and how it is now in 2009 and even though bad still it is a heck of a lot better then it was. Also I see in the younger generation which for some unknown reason this 20 something crowd just loves contacting me and chatting with me that they have a lot less problems then I did at their age. So all we can do is keep up the little fights and maybe one day it will be better. Joe
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[User Picture]From: myeyesaintblue
2009-03-14 11:30 pm (UTC)

Re: Well I'm proud of you two

Thanks Joe, and yeah, Hank wanted to stay on that high road but he was very angry and let himself get pushed off of it pretty fast.

We're so sorry to hear about your friend's friend getting beaten in Salt Lake and his car vandalized. That is so terrible! I hope he's okay, but I know the invisible scars are the ones that take the longest to heal. Hank never admitted it to Ed, but he was pretty shaken up by that confrontation. The Prop 8 fall-out and gay folks starting to protest for their rights here really is stirring up some very strong anti-gay feelings. (They were always there of course, right under the surface, but now they're much-more likely to be acted upon.)

I'm glad to hear that Pennsylvania seems to be headed in a good direction. Three similar bills... just about basic rights... didn't even make it out of committee here and another one was withdrawn before that even. But maybe all of this uproar in California and Utah really will end up doing more good in other states if not here. I sure do hope we're all around to see it. And yeah, if nothing else, the younger generation is what gives us hope. (Well... maybe not here so much either... but in most places.)
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[User Picture]From: trekfan
2009-03-13 11:05 pm (UTC)
I'm glad it didn't get uglier. That the cops weren't involved. and Ed stepped in and protected Hanks honor.

There seems to be one bigot in every crowd. I'm glad they have such good friends as Bill and Betty.

And they are home again save and sound and Ed is riding the ranch :D

I know he'll do whatever Hank wants, cause he loves him so much (and visa versa)


(Reply) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: myeyesaintblue
2009-03-14 11:47 pm (UTC)
Yeah, Hank's glad it didn't any get uglier than it did too. Ed probably never would have set foot off the ranch again if it had.

Hank's real glad they have friends like Bill and Betty too. It makes a huge difference, especially for Ed who doesn't open up to other folks so easily.

And yeah, it'd take more than that to keep Ed from his appointed rounds. :D
(Reply) (Parent) (Thread)
From: (Anonymous)
2009-03-14 02:39 am (UTC)
I`m so sorry for Ed and for Hank. Some people are just ignorant idiots. But I'm sure glad they have good friends like Betty and Bill and Myrna. I hope Hank takes lots of pictures of their trip and shares their adventures with us. I love road trips! And I'm sure it will be good for them, give them a chance to relax and have fun.

(Reply) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: myeyesaintblue
2009-03-14 11:51 pm (UTC)
Thanks, that is so nice of you to say. And Hank will definitely take a lot of pictures, he just has to somehow make room for them on his computer when he gets back. He's also out of room on LJ and has to figure that out too. (Hank takes a lot of pictures...) And yeah, Hank is most definitely looking forward to getting out of here for a while.
(Reply) (Parent) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: graciesdaddy
2009-03-14 02:39 am (UTC)

It's going to be guys like Ed 'n' Hank...

...who will be on the front lines of equal rights.

If you're of a mind, blue, visit PostMormon.org sometime. I think you'll find some like-minded folks! ;)
(Reply) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: myeyesaintblue
2009-03-15 01:19 am (UTC)

Re: It's going to be guys like Ed 'n' Hank...

Well Hank's fine with being on the front lines of equal rights, but Ed isn't going to like that one bit. (So Hank's not going to tell him.)

Thanks for the link. I don't know if I've posted this before, but there's also this group specifically for GLBT Mormons and ex-Mormons and their families:


The hardest pages to read are the memorial pages to those who've committed suicide.

(The guy who hit Hank probably either wasn't Mormon or was a non-practicing "Jack-Mormon" because Mormons aren't supposed to go to drink or even go to the bars, but the anti-gay sentiment here isn't limited to just Mormons, many of the non-Mormons in this area are very anti-gay as well.)
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[User Picture]From: graciesdaddy
2009-03-19 03:29 am (UTC)

Re: It's going to be guys like Ed 'n' Hank...

Yeah... I can't go to the Affirmations [suicide] page without weeping. I don't visit often, but PostMo has become like a second home to me.

Aren't you [and Ed'n'Hank] in southern U-DUH!?
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[User Picture]From: myeyesaintblue
2009-05-10 05:44 pm (UTC)

Re: It's going to be guys like Ed 'n' Hank...

Apologies for taking so long to respond to your comment. We were camping for a couple of weeks and then having a whole lotta computer problems and whatnot since we got back.

And yeah... we're in southwestern U-DUH(!) Although Ed is originally from the northeastern corner of the state (near the Wyoming/Colorado borders, not the Idaho/Wyoming borders.)

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[User Picture]From: bbmgirlfan
2009-03-14 04:19 am (UTC)
I notice this story has taken quite a turn for the political. Of course, I always agree. But it feels heavy sometimes.

They are so cute, though, that it's always nice to see them and visit for a while.

"But... ya know... I coulda taken care of it myself..."

"You were on the floor, Hank..."

"Tha's only 'cause I was kinda off-balance when he hit me... 'N I woulda got up. Sooner or later."

"Most likely later."

They are so funny!

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[User Picture]From: myeyesaintblue
2009-03-15 01:42 am (UTC)
Yeah, the ills of the world and living in such an ultra-conservative place weigh pretty heavy on Hank sometimes, (You should see the reams of conversation he edits out... Then again, you’d probably rather not... :=D ) And Hank knows he ends up preaching to the choir more than he should. Just ask Ed. (Ed just rolled his eyes and said, "You have NO idea.")

Hank resolved to try and lighten up some after the election and in the new year, but then Ed went and took him to 'MILK' and then a week later they ran into that jerk at the bar and Hank just couldn’t not write about those things. (So technically, it’s partly Ed and Betty’s fault... :=) )

Also, with the Prop 8 stuff spilling over into Utah and all the very vocal anti-gay sentiment that’s everywhere here and the three bills for just basic rights for gays (not even close to civil unions) being squashed like bugs without ever even making it out of committee - it’s spelled out something very clearly that Hank always pretty much knew but yet never really had to face as a cold, hard fact before - that he and Ed probably never will be able to get even basic equal rights in Utah, much less get legally hitched, unless the federal government steps in and does right by gay folks across this entire country.

Hank also knows Ed couldn’t stand moving off the ranch to a more welcoming city or state, so he knows he just has to make his peace with it. (But he’ll never stop fighting, of course.)

Well, that’s probably a whole lot more than you wanted to know, but Hank’s glad you still think they're funny, and glad you said how you felt. And he can’t make any promises, BUT... the idea is that this camping trip, and if he can get Ed to go somewhere in summer too, will get Hank out of his funk and maybe end up making Ed do some stuff that’ll give Hank something else to write about.

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From: bentgyro
2009-03-14 06:23 am (UTC)
I love you guys and us Betty an Myrna's will always come out and fight for you! How stupid is it that this stuff is still going on? These Utah guys need their mothers to come out and give them a big smack on the back of their heads and say "smarten up!!!!" It sickens me!
Thank you for this!
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[User Picture]From: myeyesaintblue
2009-03-15 02:09 am (UTC)
Thanks! That is so sweet of you to say. And yeah, it's all pretty stupid, and for Ed pretty damn nerve-wracking. (And for Hank too, but he doesn't like to admit it.) And yeah, I wish all those mothers would realize how much power they would have to change things if they would just decide to band together and do so.

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From: mazaher
2009-03-14 08:11 am (UTC)
Hooray for Betty and Myrna! and I'm relieved that crisis management against this outbreak of bigotry was in a measure successful.
One of the (many) things I really can't wrap my mind around is that mankind is just now sending space probes in search of aliens, more or less inviting them down to tea, while here on Earth a lot of people still can't accept diversity *within our own species*: different genders, different religions (or lack thereof), different choices of relationship, different eating habits, or colors of skin, or of eyes...
I hope aliens, if any, will be *very* careful before making any contact whatsoever. (Remember "The Man Who Fell To Earth"?)
Now that I'm at it, let me also quote, on a more hopeful level, Morgan Freeman's answer to the little girl asking him why he is black: "Because God loves wonderful variety" ("Robin Hood" by Kevin Reynolds). S/He sure does, or S/He wouldn't have produces such a plenty of bug species =)
Enjoy your camping, you all
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[User Picture]From: myeyesaintblue
2009-03-15 04:16 am (UTC)
Hank seconds that hooray for Betty and Mryna. And Hank talked to Bill afterwards and it seems that Betty pretty much stayed on the high road while Myrna seems to have veered off of it every now and again.

And yeah, Hank figures earth must be on some kind of inter-planetary travel warning list as a planet to avoid if at all possible, so he doesn't really expect to see that UFO land in the yard anytime soon.

Love Morgan Freeman's answer to the little girl. It's amazing that so many people can't see that.

And thanks, we will do our best to enjoy our camping trip.
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[User Picture]From: samtyr
2009-03-14 01:59 pm (UTC)
I enjoyed reading this. I am sorry that Ed and Hank still have to cope with so much hate and stupidity from people who have probably known them all for many years but remain ignorant.

On another note, this author was recently on "The Daily Show": "Unfriendly Fire" by Nathaniel Frank. If you can get it online, I recommend that you watch it.
Here is a brief review from Amazon:
When the “don’t ask, don’t tell” policy emerged as a political compromise under Bill Clinton in 1993, it only ended up worsening the destructive gay ban that had been on the books since World War II. Drawing on more than a decade of research and hundreds of interviews, Nathaniel Frank exposes the military’s policy toward gays and lesbians as damaging and demonstrates that “don’t ask, don’t tell” must be replaced with an outright reversal of the gay ban.

Frank is one of the nation’s leading experts on gays in the military, and in his evenhanded and always scrupulously documented chronicle, he reveals how the ban on open gays and lesbians in the U.S. military has greatly increased discharges, hampered recruitment, and—contrary to the rationale offered by proponents of the ban—led to lower morale and cohesion within military ranks.

Frank does not shy away from tackling controversial issues, and he presents indisputable evidence showing that gays already serve openly without causing problems, and that the policy itself is weakening the military it was supposed to protect. In addition to the moral pitfalls of the gay ban, Frank shows the practical damage it has wrought. Most recently, the discharge of valuable Arabic translators (who happen to be gay) under the current policy has left U.S. forces ill-equipped in the fight against terrorism.

Part history, part exposé, and fully revealing, Unfriendly Fire is poised to become the definitive story of “don’t ask, don’t tell.” This lively and compelling narrative is sure to make the blood boil of any American who cares about national security, the right to speak the truth, or just plain common sense and fairness.
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[User Picture]From: myeyesaintblue
2009-03-15 04:33 am (UTC)
Thanks. Yeah, it's especially tough on Hank to live in a town where some of the folks who seem friendly to his face aren't really his friends. (It's interesting that you said that because Hank didn't mention it to Ed the night it happened, but Hank knew one of the guys who was with the jerk who said that and hit him. It was a guy from the ranch store who Hank often talked to and thought of as somewhat of a friend.)

Thanks for the review of Nathaniel Frank's book. We don't have cable so we watch some of the Dailey Show stuff online, but we missed that one. It's all so completely stupid and outrageous. He probably mentioned this on the show, but there were 11 openly gay soldiers kicked out of the military this past January. Here's a link in case he didn't.


Thanks for the previous comments too! Sorry I didn't get a chance to respond to them yet.
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[User Picture]From: argentine65
2009-03-20 02:17 pm (UTC)

Ed and Hank

"Bill said a few of the folks in the bar started applaudin' fer Betty 'n Myrna..." and I do too. And I love this story:
"One big dumbass falls real hard fer another big dumbass... 'n they eventually manage ta get together permanent-like 'n live happily ever after... most a the time anyways...".Thank you so much. Martha
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[User Picture]From: myeyesaintblue
2009-05-10 05:46 pm (UTC)

Re: Ed and Hank

Hank will join you in applauding Betty and Myrna too. He's real glad they gave him what for.

Glad you liked this one too!
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[User Picture]From: lara_pinta
2009-03-22 04:00 am (UTC)
This chapter's storyline was poignant but today I feel like concentrating on the humour ans sweetness of your work I and just loved this whole exchange:
"I got a better idea... How 'bout you jus' be Hank 'n I'll jus' be Ed...?"
"Ed 'n Hank, huh...?"
"Yeah. Hank 'n Ed."
"What's the story line...?"
"One big dumbass falls real hard fer another big dumbass... 'n they eventually manage ta get together permanent-like 'n live happily ever after... most a the time anyways..."

And I am pleased that Ed and Hank got to watch Heath win the Oscar.

Thank you

"I dunno... I guess I'm willin' ta give it a go... but it sounds a l'il dull..."

"Yeah... I wish... C'mere, dumbass..."
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[User Picture]From: myeyesaintblue
2009-05-10 05:48 pm (UTC)
Hank prefers concentrating on the humor, (when he can anyways) too.

And yeah, Heath sure did deserve that Oscar.

Glad you liked this post too!
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